Mail Call!

As we are set to begin the final weekend of this trip, I think it's a good time to answer a few questions we've been getting:

So how was Singapore?

It's been a good few days here. If you've never been, Singapore is like a big, cheap American city, only Chinatown is really big and the rich white neighborhood is where Chinatown should be. A majority of the people here are of Chinese descent, though, like Malaysia, there are a number of ethnic Indians and Malays as well. Unlike Malaysia, there is also a sizable expat population of Westerners - we've met a few Americans, Europeans and Australians who live here permanently.

Everything's in English here. We thought that some form of Chinese would dominate, and that English was widely spoken as a second language. Not so - when the signs are in only one language, it's usually in English. Chinese, Bahasa Malaysian, and something else we don't recognize (I'm guessing Hindi) are the next three. So aside from the different ethnic mix, it feels a lot like home here. We can even drink the tap water!

Hart, I'm really proud of Allie for buying the Balenciaga a few weeks ago - and now I'm hearing that Singapore is a shopping paradise. Can you speak to that?

Let's put it this way: If you take Michigan Avenue, Fifth Avenue, and Rodeo Dr., and string them together, you get Orchard Road. It's like nothing you'll ever see anywhere else. American suburbs have nothing on Singapore when it comes to shopping malls, and Orchard Road is like a huge string of more upscale malls all in a row. If we could get either of our mothers to come here, we'd only buy a one-way ticket - because once they saw the shopping, I don't think we could get them to leave.

What about the food? What have you been eating?

We're not entirely sure. We've had better guesses here, but some things in Thailand, Malaysia, and Cambodia, you just have to take on faith. Allie's subsisted primarily on various forms of Indian food, mangosteens, and chicken rice. I've been a little more adventurous in terms of cuisine, mostly because I like this kind of food more than Allie does. Adding it up, we've had Indian, Thai, Khmer, Chinese, Italian, Japanese, Korean, and a little taste of home, not to mention gobs of delicious fresh fruit. We're not starving, not by a long shot.

You've got some of that food on your face. Would you stop blogging and find a napkin?

I'd love to - but napkins seem to be the one thing this part of the world needs. If a restaurant gives you a napkin at all, it's this little dinky thing, and you have to beg and plead for a second. I guess these are the neatest eaters you'll find, because it's not like we're seeing noodles hanging from beards as we walk the streets. It's a really strange thing - and a little tough, because as you all know, we aim for a 50% ratio of food on our plate that goes into the mouth.

What is the average wingspeed of a swallow?

African or European?

So what did you do in Singapore, anyway?

A lot, considering we were only here for two days. I mentioned Orchard Road already - that was yesterday afternoon. Allie did some MAJOR shopping there, and for every dollar she spent, I earned a point for being a good sport and suffering through the whole thing. Guys, send your wives, girlfriends, and daughters to Orchard Road, and either make your way to a bar, coffee shop, or golf course. I wish I'd known that ahead of time.

Before that, we visited the Battle Box, which is the old, original bunker built in the 30s by the British to be a command post in case of attack. The Brits were the colonial powers here from the early 19th century until 1965, when Singapore became independent (actually, a few years earlier, Singapore was a part of an independent Federation of Malaya - in '65, it split to become its own sovereignty, and Malaya became Malaysia). Anyway, the Battle Box was put into use when Japan attacked in late 1941. We all know about Pearl Harbor, but what most of us don't know is that Japan coordinated a series of attacks in December 1941 on the Phillipines and the Malaysian peninsula as well. The Brits used the Battle Box to coordinate their defense against the Japanese, but in February 1942, made the decision there to surrender. It was the first time that any Asian nation had defeated the British and only the second time that an Asian nation defeated any Western one (Russia lost something to the Chinese, I think, around 1900. Is there a history professor in the audience?). Anyway, a lot of the Battle Box has been preserved, and we really enjoyed both seeing it and learning the history of this place before, during and after WW2. One notable item we learned is that while the Box was well hidden 9 meters below the ground, the ventilation was very bad. Often, the British soldiers had to take turns stepping outside to vomit, because in the hot weather, their long pants and sleeved-uniforms, and the bad ventilation, the Box was a terribly miserable place to be.

We also hit the Botanic Gardens, a wonderful oasis in this big-time metropolis. Focusing on the Orchid Garden, we spent about two hours there between the Box and Orchard Road. The orchid is the national flower of Singapore, and they've put together quite a nice area full of hundreds of original types of orchids and even more hybrids that they've invented. Whenever a celebrity or an international political somebody visits, they seem to invent a new hybrid and name it after the visitor (or, often in the case of a foreign dignitary, his wife). It was a very pleasant way to spend a bit of time here.

Did you get more points for the shopping or for the orchids?

The referees are tallying the score now. It's close, that much I know.

Anyway, after Orchard Road, we went to Little India again (we'd spent some time bumming around there on Tuesday afternoon) to dine at a place recommended by one of our travel guides. Like I said, we've been eating a lot of Indian food. I still think our best was the place in Penang where they brought us all sorts of delicious unknown edibles without us having to choose, but this place was also pretty good. After that, we dropped all 17 of Allie's shopping bags at the hotel, and headed off to the Night Safari. What an experience! It's like San Diego's Wild Animal Park, only perhaps even better (though it's been a while since I've been to WAP). They've got a great collection of animals, mostly those native to Southeast Asia, in large and unfenced (though not completely free) living areas. We took a tram around the park, and walked a few trials, getting real up close and personal with rhinos, flying squirrels, leopards, wild pigs, hippos, deer (some literally were walking alongside the tram route; if we'd stopped, we could have pet them!), and so on. The only downside was that we couldn't take photos; the flashes disturb the animals, and the last thing anybody wants is a wild South American tapir running amok (did you know that's a Malay word?). But all in all, it's an amazing place and I'd recommend it to anyone visiting Singapore.

Today, we took a tour of the old Arab St. neighborhood. When the British colonized the island, they were careful to designate certain areas in which each ethnicity was to live, along with a specified commercial/merchant zone and a warehouse district. A lot of these classifications remain to this day, and so, not surprisingly, the area around Arab St. is full of Muslims of all kinds. We enjoyed learning a bit about Singapore's history, the customs of the neighborhood and some interesting tidbits about Islam in general. The neighborhood itself is awfully cool - lots of great stores selling various fabrics and clothes, ethnic goodies and foods, and plenty of interesting smells from the many cafes and restaurants. Like Little India, it's a neat little pocket of people whose culture is both tremendously different and rich. It's also nice to see such culture in what can be an otherwise sterile country.

There's more to what we did today - but I have to cut it short because the only open Internet cafe here in Samui is way too expensive (by Thai standards, that is). We tried hitting Chinatown, but Allie's flip-flops broke, so we barely saw the neighborhood and instead hunted down a shoe store. I'm telling you, there's good shopping in Singapore.

Woof woof woof, woof woof woof woof?

Frankie, down! No chicken rice, Frankie! No!

Speaking of dogs...unlike the other countries we've seen, there were no stray dogs wandering Singapore. Only a handful of stray cats. Otherwise, lots of canines roaming the streets. It's more than a bit sad.

Where are you bozos, anyway?

Well, when I started this post, we were at the Singapore airport (which is ridiculously immaculate - maybe the only airport I've been to where, when you're there, never mind how similar all airports are, you should know it's Singapore). But the free internet there (what a treat!) only lasted for 15 minutes at a time, and with high demand, I couldn't finish this there. So here we are now in Koh Samui, in some rain. Not what we wanted from our island paradise. We're spending just tonight at a cute little place on Bophut beach, and then to a bit of a resort on the biggest beach here, Chaweng, to end this trip in style.

And since I use the word "style," I'll close with a happy birthday wish to my dad, about whom everyone can agree that he has a style all his own. So: Happy Birthday, Dad!